Sometimes we have to look back in order to move forward.
There are days, and we all probably have them, where life seems to feel stuck. This happens at some point in our lives. Has that ever happened to you? It can be really confusing especially if all seemed well.
The idea is having an awareness.
Often we stay stuck because we are completely oblivious of the reasons. What is going on? Perhaps an implicit memory or a core wound is triggered by the news, conversations, events in life and although we are safe and secure in our life, that message to our brain is REAL. The fear and pain seem to be as alive today as when it first happened. Real or imagined, fear is fear.
How do we look back to move forward?
It is is never ‘one size’ fits all. I wish it was that simple. Not everyone is willing to face their past to move forward. However, knowing that you can get through that ‘stuck feeling’ can be and is empowering. Think about the last time you felt stuck. What did you do or not do? Feeling stuck is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign we have an opportunity to grow through our experiences. Remember you are not the same person you were as a child, not the same person ten, twenty or thirty years ago. Most of us are evolving everyday. Remember, creating your own self care tool kit is part of getting unstuck. It is okay to ask for professional help in finding the reasons for feeling stuck and why doing the same old, same old patterns is not working. Sometimes we have to feel it, sit in those feelings, think about it, in order to come out of it.
I can honestly say that these last three years have been emotionally painful and yet, during those many months, a time of deep emotional growth, learning and empowering. Learning from these experiences the wounds of the past, wow a hell of a journey to today! Would I change anything? Nope, my voice today is where it needs to be. The respectful manner in which I communicate during conflict situations and the boundaries developed is fantastic. We can come through that feeling of being stuck and helpless to one of confidence and happiness.
We are who we are from the people and events that challenge us the most. Will there be ‘stuck’ days? Probably but not today.
Reach into your self care tool kit and find the strategy which can give you a mental, emotional re-charge. Use self compassion, we are learning on the cobble stones of life.
Look back in order to move forward. You don’t live there anymore. Celebrate the fact that you are no longer chained to that past and choosing to work for a happier and better tomorrow.
“You might as well like yourself because you are going to spend a lot of time with YOU.” Jerry Lewis (The Nutty Professor 1963)