How to stay motivated?
What makes us motivated and feel motivated. It looks and feels different for everyone.
Motivation is the process that initiates, guides, and maintains goal-oriented behaviors. It is what causes you to act, whether it is getting a glass of water to reduce thirst or reading a book to gain knowledge.
Motivation involves the biological, emotional, social, and cognitive forces that activate behavior. In everyday usage, the term “motivation” is frequently used to describe why a person does something. It is the driving force behind human actions.
I get motivated to do my very best to help my clients deal with workplace conflict and bullying. I go that extra mile to give them the tools needed so that they feel motivated as well despite their workplace situation. We cannot change the workplace but we can change how we react, how we respond and what we retain and this helps keep us motivated. Fitness motivates me, using tools from my self-care tool kit motivates me every day.
Motivation is different depending on our needs, wants, hopes and dreams.
What exactly lies behind the motivations for why we act? Psychologists have proposed different theories of motivation, including drive theory, instinct theory, and humanistic theory (such as Maslow’s hierarchy of needs). The reality is that there are many different forces that guide and direct our motivations.
Why is motivation important?
There are so many places where we need to feel motivated. For example, how do you motivate your team, how do you motivate your employees, how do you stay motivated every day, how do I get motivated when I am depressed? These are all legitimate, real concerns as we navigate through life‘s adventures and traumas.
Because we are all beautifully unique, what motivates us and how we want to be motivated will be as individual as a snowflake. Those people who get promoted into positions of power need to understand that their team, their employees, their co-workers, family and friends, all have the ways they want to be motivated, and feel motivated to do their best as an employee, to feel valued.
Speaking from experience in dealing with workplace bullying for 20 years in the RCMP, most of the people in leadership roles that I had to deal with during this time, failed miserably in how they motivated the staff, their employees and co-workers. Based on my experience with a yelling, screaming, humiliation and paper-throwing boss, it was disastrous when it came to feeling motivated by his behaviour. If anything yelling, screaming, humiliation, and paper tossing behaviour had the polar opposite reaction for most of my co-workers including myself (as the target of the abuse)
Ask yourself how can you feel motivated to do your best for your boss when you are working in that type of workplace? With leadership that shows no respect for their staff, leadership who uses brutal and bullying behaviour towards you or your co-workers, can you possibly feel motivated to go that ‘extra mile’ in your work? You don’t! You are just trying to survive.
The bully boss is a motivator vacuum. The Silent Bully
The bully boss scripts a silent blood bath. Dignity is quietly dismissed. Voiceless human venom cuts deep into psyche, emotions and productivity. Empathy and emotional intelligence are curiously cancelled. Gossip, anger, grievances, turnover and civil law suits are by-products of the boss who delights in destroying with her irreverent eye brows and his death-unto-you stare.
If anything, you do just enough to get by, just enough to survive, just enough to get through the day and go home.
Day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year, slowly this environment affects our mental health which impacts our physical health as well. It was a bloody nightmare at times. Having the right coping skills to navigate a boss like that requires a little extra help, perhaps professional help, definitely a self-care tool kit and a deep understanding that a bullying boss is not your fault.
It took a few years for me to realize that I can still be motivated despite a bullying and brutal leadership style in the workplace. It took a few years before I realized how to detach from their behaviour, to separate myself from the yelling and screaming and paper tossing management style and to create a self-care tool kit that helped both in and outside of the workplace, in my everyday life. Something I continue to use this very day!
From the article What You Should Know About Apathy:
Apathy may cause disinterest in many aspects of life. You may be indifferent when you meet new people or try new things. You may show no interest in activities or addressing personal issues.
Your facial expressions may not appear to change. You may exhibit a lack of effort, planning, and emotional response. You may also spend more time by yourself.
Continued apathy can affect your ability to maintain personal relationships and perform well at school or work.
Apathy is not the same as depression, although apathy can be a symptom of depression. Depression may also cause feelings of hopelessness and guilt. Serious risks associated with depression include substance use and suicide.
During our life, we will experience moments of lack of motivation. That’s normal. However, apathy is a lack of motivation, a feeling of not caring, no interest and can be a symptom of depression and mental health issues. Seeking out positive and professional support is important to navigate through these feelings. We have to be mindful of our motivation levels and our mental health. Seek out professional help if needed.
The idea is to create tools and strategies that keep you motivated each day. Tools and strategies that re-energize your inner spirit, keep that sense of inner peace and joy, tools and strategies that make you like who you are and enjoy life to its fullest. Tools that make you want to live your best life.
To feel motivated and not feel motivated it is a choice to be curious and aware of your emotions and what motivates and de-motivates you at home, in your relationships with family, friends and the workplace.