I’m Embracing Indecision: A Journey Towards Self-Awareness
Indecision is a challenge I occasionally wrestle with, like today in deciding what to write about for my blog. I thought there must be others out there who also struggle with ‘indecision’. It’s the state of not making a decision, often because the options seem unappealing or overwhelming. We might tell ourselves, “I don’t have a choice,” but even this is a choice—to not decide. It may sound confusing, but it’s an empowering realization. Recognizing that even indecision is a choice can help us take control of our lives.
People often struggle with making decisions for various reasons. It might not feel safe, we might lack information, or the options may not seem viable or practical. This struggle isn’t a sign of failure. In fact, recognizing that you’re having a hard time making a decision is a significant step forward. Understanding our patterns of thinking and behavior is the first step toward change. It takes time and practice, but it is achievable.
As someone with an ADD brain, I find decision-making particularly challenging, especially when faced with unknown or uncomfortable situations. I prefer to gather as much information as possible before deciding, a habit perhaps honed from my 20 years as a police officer. In that role, detailed information is crucial for accurate investigations.
Once we learn something, we can’t unlearn it. It’s never too late to relearn and recognize our decision-making processes and to change them. If a pattern of thinking or behaving isn’t serving us well, it’s up to us to change it. This is part of growing up—learning from childhood what works and what doesn’t, and moving forward with more effective ways of behaving and communicating.
Fear often plays a significant role in our indecision. It’s essential to ask ourselves whether this fear is legitimate, rooted in past pain, or simply a fear of making a wrong decision. Only we can answer these questions. The key is to recognize the reasons behind our indecision, to be curious, and then to move forward.
I hold nothing from my past that I cling to. Self-awareness and willingness to change are crucial. Indecision isn’t always negative; it can keep us safe. My mantra is, “When in doubt, check it out. When in doubt, don’t do it.”
Remember you are not responsible for how other people react to your decisions. We are not responsible if our decision to do or not do offends. Are you more worried about hurting someone than your happiness, safety and peace of mind? Stop it. Set boundaries and respect your indecision/decisions and choices. Sometimes, indecision is our intuition telling us that something isn’t quite right. It’s okay to take your time and make a decision when it feels right.
Life is an adventure. Don’t waste it fearing the wrong decision. We learn from our mistakes, from what worked and what didn’t, and we can use these lessons to make better choices in the future.
Never give up on yourself. Self-awareness and self-compassion are key on this journey of understanding why we struggle with indecision and how we can overcome it.