Empowerment.
Empowerment, personal empowerment to feel strong, confident and happy. Who doesn’t want to feel strong, confident and happy? What is holding you back? Fear, negative attitudes, negative people, your past?
It seems a lifetime ago that I was locked in that dance of depression and despair. Looking back from today, I can see the journey to empowerment was filled with obstacles that with resilience, optimism and courage, self-care tools/strategies and help from a professional, managed to find my own way to success and happiness.
Whatever you do you have a choice. Our attitude is part of the journey to empowerment. I had never expected to be diagnosed with PTSD from workplace bullying and trauma at any time in my life. Life is really unexpected and we cannot always see or predict events.
Living with PTSD has its challenges.
They are good days. They’re good nights. There are bad days. They are bad nights. Having a positive attitude is what gives us resilience in life no matter what happens. There have been many occasions were finding the way through despair was incredibly difficult. Thankfully, I have excellent self-care tools, positive support, and awareness of when those dark moments can seem overwhelming. Creating a safety plan, having positive loving and non-judgemental support of people in my circle of friends and family is crucial to navigating from despair to empowerment.
None of us is immune from suffering from depression. It’s really important to recognize, be aware of your emotional fitness and good mental health. We need to know how to take care of our mental health every day so that when we are experiencing stress, sadness, and trauma, we can use those self-care tools to help our emotional and mental health. That doesn’t mean of course we don’t need professional help, therapy or medical assistance. Simply put we want to set ourselves up for success and empowerment in taking care of our mental health.
Personal Empowerment is More than a Feeling
Our sense of empowerment is a reflection of the increased personal value and self-worth that comes out of our experience of having real influence in one or more areas of our lives.
Finally, the ultimate measure of personal empowerment is witnessing real change. In the case of our example, it may be a greater balance of responsibility with our partner, or clearer boundaries with our co-worker. On the other hand, it may be that we don’t get the full measure of the change we are seeking. Either way, we have effectively engaged our empowerment by taking action that positively impacts our sense of personal value and self-worth.
Part of my self-care is sharing the lessons of 20 years of dealing with workplace bullying, sexual harassment, violence, conflict and other workplace abuse. And sharing the lessons is empowering others so that they don’t have to suffer as I did. That is empowering for me as well. Providing tools and strategies for individuals who are experiencing workplace bullying and also for management to learn another and more effective way in dealing with workplace conflict, bullying, sexual harassment and other violence in the workplace.
The journey to empowerment will be different for everyone because we are all different with our experiences, family, culture, religions, personality, and trauma.
People see me today and think I have got it made!
Not the reality. Clearly, they missed the last 20 years of the pain in navigating through fear, PTSD, workplace bullying and harassment. Empowerment is in recognizing our fears and what is holding us back. I refused to allow those events to destroy the rest of my life. It is an ongoing active choice and can be bloody frustrating sometimes. Be patient, have self-compassion as you learn and grow on the path to empowerment. None of us is perfect and each of us is doing the best we can with the life skills we have at the time. The good thing is that once you realize you want to become empowered means letting go of people, the past, and the pain to move forward. Everyone takes their own time and it is never too late to become empowered.
Life is about making active decisions to feel happy, confident and successful. It is a choice who we decide to do with our pain in trauma, it is a choice to stay such and do nothing. Doing nothing is not effective or empowering but it is a choice.
Where do you want to live, in the past and miserable, in pain, stuck and voiceless or be brave and push through the fear, let go of the pain, take the lessons, seek out professional help if needed, maybe medication, create self-care tools and strategies for good mental and physical health, be curious and never give up on you.
Ask yourself, ‘what am I waiting for in life?’ No one is going to change you except you, no one can make you happy, feel strong or happy except you.