Traveling solo can be scary and thrilling.
It was an early morning ringtone that catapulted me out of my silent slumber and snugly warm bed. Getting up at 5 AM is not something I do every day, and I certainly appreciate those folks who do and keep our economy going. There’s a mixture feeling inside me of excitement and anxiety because I’m leaving my best buddy/husband for the week and he had a recent loss with the death of his sister. The sudden loss and the grief have been difficult for us to navigate.
Sometimes we need to do things by ourselves, so we appreciate the things we have and it is good to have a re-check or re-set. I love swimming and playing in the water and snorkeling and we’ve been doing this every year for at least 15 years. We’ve been to Cuba and Mexico, Cuba being our favorite destination. We like the same hotel and the familiarity of knowing what to expect.
We enjoy traveling to Cuba for a variety of reasons, the people are incredibly friendly The current economic climate, and the history are locked in a time vault from 1959 when Castro took over Cuba with his revolution. Of course, the food the coffee and the rum also added benefits to this beautiful, romantic, culturally rich country. It’s warm!
At the airport I sit in the lounge enjoying the view, in a comfortable chair, I’m reminded of all the gifts I have to be thankful for in my life. The most cherished and important person just dropped me off at the airport.
Anytime you’re traveling internationally are always kind of hiccups, the first hiccough was our plane was half an hour late departure. This would not be an issue. Had I not made arrangements to be my friend and her husband in Cuba and it was their last day. However, after landing, everything seemed to go incredibly smoothly through customs, getting my bag getting on the bus, and getting to the hotel. It was a complete surprise to realize that I got the same room David and I had three years ago overlooking a beautiful, pool and bar, and in the distance was the ocean.
Once my suitcase arrived, I quickly changed and went to meet my friends. Two years ago we met Julie and her husband at this hotel. Over this time we both kept in contact for another visit in Cuba. Last year was different traveling with our teenage niece and had to stay at another hotel that allows children. This year was great even though it was a short visit felt like we had been together much longer. Good people make you feel welcome as if no time has passed. We had a wonderful time sharing some drinks, a nice meal, and lots of laughter. They are kind and beautiful people.
Up the next morning, after a rather restless sleep, which usually happens when I’m traveling alone, went down to stick out the beach chair and unfortunately a woman got there before me and got the last one. Not feeling discouraged I just found another one closer to the pool bar.
After lathering myself with sunscreen, like one would oil a fish before baking, I made my way to the ocean. It was difficult to see anything because the previous two days it had been stormy, so there was a lot of sand and it was cloudy. However, I did find one Small shell.
There’s something magical about this place. We have traveled to this particular hotel several times, pre-and post-Covid, and yet the beauty of the landscape, the ocean view always impress.
The best part about traveling is being curious about the people that you meet. I like to travel with different kinds of hats because they are excellent conversation starters. This particular year I took my hat that said NYPD, which certainly started many because there aren’t a lot of Americans who come to Cuba.
Anytime I sat down for a coffee or swam up to the pool bar, or went to one of the restaurants, including the buffet people would look, smile, and quite often start a conversation. Sometimes a comment might’ve been less than cordial, and I look at that as a reflection of them, not me. It’s just a hat.
For me on this trip, I enjoyed the week of self-inner reflection. Anytime in our lives, when we have an opportunity to really do some inner work and growth is part of empowerment, moving forward, and letting go. Although I miss my husband a lot, this is our favourite romantic place for sun, sea, and alone time together, I thoroughly enjoyed my time.
I’ve met the most amazing people, couples individuals, business people, and retired people from all over the globe, and we all had one thing in common, enjoying Cuba.
Sitting at the pool bar, enjoying a festive beverage, I met some fantastic people from England, and all provinces in Canada.
A few folks were surprised I was traveling by myself, and when I explained the reason, they seemed to comprehend and I could see they felt empowered to try new things on their own. I think it’s wonderful to see women traveling, and experiencing life on their terms. Having a partner does not mean life is more enjoyable. Imagine being in a loveless marriage, you do things together but are you really happy? For me, I would rather be alone than wish I was alone. My relationship is built on love, mutual respect for boundaries, trust, encouragement, forgiveness and lots of laughter. This is a different type of trip to Cuba less romance more self-discovery, and totally awesome for both experiences.
I met the most amazing couples from the UK. Two couples I called the FAB FOUR. They were celebrating their 70th birthday with good friends they’d known for 40 years. It was indeed an honour to be part of their group over a few days, meeting at the pool bar, and in the restaurants and sharing so many laughs. I learned a lot of different unique expressions and truly enjoyed how much fun these women embraced life to its fullest. I met another lovely couple from Moncton and shared lots of laughs and a couple of Spanish coffees. It was even a privilege to meet different people, and learn about their work experiences, and life, if they had any experience dealing with workplace bullying and sharing in the sun and fun.
For five mornings in a row, I did yoga and one of the Brits I had met was there every day. Awesome fun first thing in the morning, getting mentally and physically prepared for playing in the sun, and enjoying life alone. Our yoga and dance instructors Dennis, Adrain, and Jordy were lots of fun. If you are traveling alone join in the fitness, dancing, Spanish lessons, and other activities that don’t require a partner. Just learn to like your own company.
If you think about it, I was never really alone, surrounded by hundreds of fellow travelers from all over, seeking the sanctuary of the sun and the sea. My hope was to encourage other people to recognize that they don’t need a partner to Travel, they don’t need a partner to have fun they don’t need a partner to live their very best life.
Don’t get me wrong I love my husband beyond words. His suffering has an impact on me with the loss of his sister. We cannot avoid the pain. That emptiness in his life now will have to be filled with something else, hopefully, something positive, less sad and stressful. Remember when life changes how we refill ourselves is called self-care. Grief is an individual process with no time limits.
Something I was looking forward to was that sense of inner peace I get from swimming in the ocean. There’s something magical about swimming/snorkeling in the crystal clear warm (turquoise) water looking at the dunes, rippling with the small water currents. Gently gliding through the water in search of a treasure below. The transparent fish chasing smaller fish. Little blue fish that you can’t see unless you’re looking under the water from the side. Thankfully, I bring my snorkel and mask everywhere I go. Several years ago I got my eye prescription put in the lens so I could see things clearly and it made a huge difference. Worth the money, my friends.
Over the many days, I would go in and out from my beach chair to swim and snorkel for 40 minutes come back to the pool rest up, drink water, and return to the sea. It’s no wonder I ate several times a day. One of the Brits commented that I had a healthy appetite and must have a highly active metabolism. I said, yes, my husband says ‘I have a metabolism like a bird, a pterodactyl.’ Of course, everyone laughed. A great sense of humour is what I like about people. Not taking ourselves too seriously.
At this particular hotel, they had four à la cart restaurants, and I had no problem going to the dinners solo. One thing I did notice was they stuck me beside a post for one night, but that was OK I brought a book, and I enjoyed the scenery through the glass, totally awesome beautiful pink, and orange sunsets. We have a choice in how we react to different situations in life. I like to focus on the positive. Here I am in Cuba, a lovely hotel, with the sounds of birds and, the smell of the sea, dressed up, sitting in a beautiful hotel, enjoying a totally awesome yummy meal. I didn’t have to prepare, and enjoying a lovely sunset. Life is good.
Looking back on my week, there was something I was very thankful for experiencing, and that was truly surrendering and letting go of my past. Letting go of past hurts, misunderstandings, wrongs, and disappointments by people who were considered my friends. Learning to understand that they are on their own individual journey and may not be where I have discovered the importance and value of self-care and boundaries. Remember, it’s OK, to let go of people who do not respect your boundaries.
Everyone’s different and after the week I was very much ready to come home and face my new reality, the emptiness from the death of my sister-in-law. The trip home Was one more glitch and we were 12 hours late. Needless to say it took a couple of days to get my Canadian feet back on the ground and a few more days to get climate ties to the cold.
Having many chats through a compassionate and curious lens during the week, asking questions about other folks, their experiences, and ideas, we can always learn. Perhaps people who need therapy will be brave enough to take the steps to emotional healing. Be willing to deal with mental health challenges to find inner peace. Maybe stop drinking, negative self-talk, or other destructive behaviors. We never know how our kindness, curiosity, and nonjudgmental conversations help people. We only see a snapshot of people, if we choose anything let it be kindness.
This week in Cuba was truly an adventure, I’m very thankful to have experienced and been encouraged by my husband to travel and go snorkeling. Meeting those amazing people from around the globe, I like to think that we plant seeds of kindness and humanity in each other. We are more alike than different and when we focus on our similarities, this is where we can build bridges of understanding, hope and inclusion for all.
Travel knocks down walls of misunderstanding, prejudices, and ignorance, and builds bridges of understanding hope and inclusion. Try to get on as many flights as possible to learn about the world and different perspectives. Never let the past, negative people/opinions stop you from enjoying life and traveling.
“Life’s little glitches are just detours in the grand adventure of solo travel; embrace them with a smile and a sense of humor.”