Thriving Beyond Trauma: Embracing Life with PTSD
We can’t rewrite the past, no matter how desperately we might want to. After enduring 20 years of workplace bullying, sexual assault, harassment, and violence, I’ve come to understand that trauma doesn’t come with a delete button. It’s not something you can simply wish away. Pretending the past didn’t happen only keeps us trapped in a cycle of emotional pain.
For those living with depression and PTSD, even the simplest tasks can feel like climbing a mountain. But each day begins with a choice: to get up, get dressed, brush your teeth, and face the world. It’s not about letting the past dictate your future. Instead, it’s about reclaiming your life and living each day to its fullest. Ask yourself, why allow the actions of others or traumatic events to control your destiny? Only you can answer that.
I once believed that leaving the toxic environment of workplace bullying would be enough to heal. Everything would go back to ‘normal’. PTSD was the new normal. But the reality is that as we endure such hardships, we change. This change can be gradual, like a quiet strength growing within us as we stand up for ourselves and others. Yes, speaking out can make us targets, but looking back now, I see that it was worth every battle scar.
Staying silent and doing nothing isn’t the answer—it only perpetuates the problem. We may not always notice it, but trauma changes us. Sometimes, I don’t recognize the person staring back at me in the mirror. Yet, that person is stronger, braver, and more resilient than ever before. While we can’t erase the scars, we can carry the lessons forward.
People have asked me if I regret joining the RCMP, given everything I endured. My answer is a resounding “No.” The person I see in the mirror is someone who was battered by an organization she once loved, but who found the strength to use her voice and thrive. Not just survive, but thrive—taking action to raise awareness, encourage others to speak out, and educate on the dangers of ignoring workplace bullying and conflicts.
It’s crucial to recognize your worth today. The past is a chapter in your story, not the whole book. Clinging to pain only prevents you from moving forward. Ask yourself: do you want to remain stuck in the past, or do you want to embrace the future? Your happiness and success are yours to define.
Set yourself up for success with small steps. Living with PTSD might feel like a life sentence, but it doesn’t have to be. Learning self-care tools and strategies is a powerful step toward reclaiming your life. Here is my TEDx Winnipeg 2015 talk that describes my tool kit. Laughter is a huge part of reclaiming our voice (for me ), finding the funny in each day releases those ‘feel good hormones’ and helps with depression/anxiety/PTSD. We are all unique and your tool kit will look and feel different.
Create a work-life balance, indulge in hobbies that recharge you, and set firm boundaries for yourself and others. Boundaries are essential; those who don’t respect them likely have none themselves. Learn the power of saying “no” and surround yourself with positive, uplifting people—not members of the “moan and groan” society.
Life will throw challenges your way—illness, accidents, loss—but maintaining a positive attitude, practicing self-care, and building a supportive network will strengthen your resilience. If you need a boost, write little notes with positive messages and place them around your home, car, or workplace. They can serve as gentle reminders during tough moments.
Therapy worked for me. It taught me about boundaries, self-care, and ultimately, it saved me. Through therapy, a positive mindset, and unwavering determination, I navigated my darkest days. Today, my work gives me hope that one day, workplace bullying, and its devastating consequences will be things of the past. We’re not there yet, but I remain hopeful.
More and more people are speaking out against workplace bullying, and change is happening. We now have International Bullying Awareness Week, companies are implementing policies to address workplace harassment, and there’s a growing awareness of the importance of mental health. However, it’s important to remember that policies are only as effective as the people who enforce them. Otherwise, they’re just words on paper.
I live with PTSD, and I always will. But it doesn’t control me. Every day, I make the conscious choice to navigate my triggers and keep moving forward, embracing the joy and happiness that life has to offer.
I wouldn’t change a thing about my life. The best parts of who we are today often come from the challenges we’ve faced. Embrace your future, seize the opportunities of today, and savor the moments that bring you joy.
We may not be the same people we were before experiencing bullying, and that’s okay. The person you are today is a blend of courage, resilience, inner strength, and a powerful voice. Never give up. Never let anyone use your past against you. Believe in your voice and live your best life every day.
Life is a gift, and so are you!
