Can I stay happy?
How do we hang onto our happy feelings?
Sometimes we can have moments, days, or weeks where we feel extremely happy. That’s totally awesome. I have been in those happy shoes. It’s a wonderful place to be on the journey of life. Happiness or our definition of what is happiness is an individual experience. Ask yourself what makes me happy, what does it look and feel like? If you don’t know then this is something to work on. In some cases, people need professional help that could be of benefit to unlock those negative experiences and find your own way to discovering your own happiness.
The big question is what do we do when we’re not feeling so happy when things are not going so well when we are feeling mad, sad, pissed off, or just empty inside?
I get that question a lot. Being a curious person I began to think about why this happens. Thinking about what do I do when I’m feeling all of the above. Suddenly I realized that it’s important to certainly focus on those positive feelings because those feelings are imprinted in our bodies. Every emotion you feel your body remembers. Every trauma you experience your body remembers. Yikes!
Good news, and of course I always like to focus on the good news, is we can learn to store up those happy moments days or weeks and bring them out when we are having those down days. For example, on those happy days, I like to think about where I want to put them on a shelf in my head under the category of ‘happiness’.
During times of stress, sadness, trauma, and grief, I pull out that happiness file and look through all the moments, all the people, all those happy feel-good moments. This takes time and it takes practice to be able to do it quickly? Personally, I hate hanging in those negative feelings I don’t like drama unless it’s on TV, I’d prefer to find ways to have happiness as a daily experience.
Of course in reality that’s not always the case. It was difficult to navigate through my father’s death, a sense of loss, people getting sick, accidents, Covid pandemic, various events in life I have no control over that can cause our emotions to sink in negativity. Remember what you can control and what you cannot control. There is a difference and it takes awareness.
Having just returned from a weekend yoga retreat, where I met the most amazing men and women, learned about their life stories, and enjoyed the benefits to the mind, body, spirit, and emotions with yoga, my heart was filled to bursting with happiness.
It’s always a thrill to get out of my comfort zone, and try something new, meet new people, be in a new situation and see what happens. If you think about it the only thing we regret in life is not trying new things, not experiencing something different because of fear. Fear keeps us stuck, it keeps us paralyzed and prevents us from moving forward from our pain, sadness, and trauma. From personal experience, I know exactly what it’s like to be stuck in that spiral of negative thinking and pain. It took several years before I began to create my own self-care tools for good mental health. Good mental health depends on how you take care of yourself. No one else can do it for you, just you!
Do you find that empowering?
Absolutely!!! Just imagine you can transform your negativity into happiness. I’m not saying it’s going to be easy I’m not saying it’s going to be pleasant, what I’m saying is you can do it. You have to try. You have to try to get out of your negative thinking and mindset to shift to a more mindful positive, encouraging, empowering inner voice. The transformation is amazing. Life begins to be livable, life begins to be enjoyable, Life begins to be happy.
Recently while shopping, one of the cashiers asked how I was. A common question people ask as a form of being polite. My answer came without even a second thought, “I’m so happy I could explode.” Of course, the other person was taken aback then began to laugh and smile at this comment. To me, that was a gift. I sent out a seed of happiness, and it was planted immediately.
Today practice thinking of things that made you feel happy, good, energized, and at peace.
Write them down if you have to put them in a file folder, write a little note, and put it on your bedroom mirror, add these positive messages onto your phone somewhere where you can pull them out on a ‘not-so-good day’ and have those feel-good feelings flood through your body.
Each of us has our own challenges,
and you never know what’s happening for someone else at that moment. Be compassionate with yourself and be kind to others. Set boundaries, create your own self-care tools that take care of your mind, your body, your spirit, and your emotions, this is your physical and mental health. Never give up on yourself. Keep expanding your comfort zone, try new things, practice self-compassion, always be curious, and live your absolute best awesome life today and every day.
